subscribe to newsletter
Little food critics
“No! That’s groooooosssss!” Peas are pushed from one side of the plate to the other, but none of them find their way into the child’s mouth. It usually starts at 18 months—little ones become pickier about their food or refuse to even try it. Mealtimes can cause a lot of stress for parents and guardians as children begin to see them as an opportunity to exert their own will. Is my child eating enough? Are they getting the right nutrients? What if they develop a deficiency? And why can’t they just eat what I put on the table?
What are picky eaters?
Children who are very selective about what they eat are known as “picky eaters”. This term should be distinguished from other disorders, such as a general refusal to eat, ARFID (avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder) and organic feeding disorders. Among children aged three to eleven, 13-22 percent are considered picky eaters, and 18 to 40 percent remain picky eaters into adolescence. Unfamiliar foods are particularly problematic, but children may suddenly even refuse familiar and previously acceptable foods. The range of foods that the children eat can therefore be very limited. This worries parents, as they grow concerned about their child’s nutrient intake. Will my child get enough nutrients if they only eat pasta without any sauce day in, day out?
Causes of picky eating
An important trigger of picky eating is an intense fear of new things. This is also known as neophobia and occurs particularly between 18 months and five years. There are various explanations for this behaviour.
On the one hand, this aversion is linked to child development. Toddlers begin to move around independently and explore their surroundings at 18 months. An aversion to foreign objects can be a helpful defence mechanism so that they do not put cigarette butts lying around or poisonous plants in their mouths the second someone looks away.
Genetically speaking, we also prefer sweet and fatty foods. Sweetness is a reliable indication that the food is ripe and has therefore reached its maximum nutrient content. Fatty foods have a high energy density and are therefore among the superstars of food from an evolutionary perspective. Young children often overlook vegetables because they do not correspond to this genetic predisposition to sweet and fatty foods. Children must get to know and learn to love a variety of foods and flavours,
and learning new things requires energy and free resources. The same goes for exploring flavours. You may have noticed that even if they do not have neophobia, tired children have no desire to experiment or try new things and prefer familiar, tried and tested flavours and dishes.
In addition to taste, other sensations such as odour, appearance and consistency also play an important role in the formation of preferences. An aversion to stews, for example, is very common. In stews, many different foods with different consistencies are mixed together, meaning the child cannot predict the consistency of the next bite. Unpredictability can trigger aversion and even fear, particularly in highly sensitive children. Children with hypersensitivity perceive odour, consistency, taste and visual aspects more intensely. A mixture of different odours, consistencies and tastes can lead to a real sensory overload and require a lot of willingness to learn and energy.
Picky eating usually impacts the atmosphere at the table too. Adults watch every bite children take and, most importantly, every crumb they leave behind. This tension then influences their appetite and willingness to continue eating. Well, would you feel comfortable eating if someone was watching your every bite like a hawk? Children also use these situations to gain control. “When children realise they are being constantly observed while eating, they also realise that they get a lot of attention when they play with their food”, says nutritional psychologist Ronia Schiftan. This is why it can be helpful to shift the focus away from the food to a positive topic during mealtimes.
Strategies for coping with picky eating
As well as the “don’ts” around picky eating, there are also many ways to deal with picky eating in a positive way. You can find some of them listed here.
1. Offer a balanced combination of foods and let the children decide what and how much they eat
For a relaxed atmosphere around the dinner table, it can help if children are allowed to decide for themselves what and how much they want to eat. Nutritionist Monique Mura Knüsel is in favour of toddlers serving themselves: “If children are able to spoon vegetable sauce and rice onto their plate separately, they are more likely to eat them together than if we served rice and sauce already mixed on the plate.” Children often have an intuitive sense of what their bodies need. Nevertheless, they must learn to judge their appetite correctly. You should allow children to self-serve and be understanding when too much ends up on their plate and they don’t want to eat it all. When we force children to finish what’s on their plate, we are saying, “You cannot sense your body’s needs.” As a result, they forget to listen to their own sensations of hunger and fullness.
This does not mean that we should only offer picky children food that they like to eat. As guardians, we decide what is put on the table and determine the variety of foods. It is important to offer at least one type of food that the child usually tolerates and to keep offering new foods or those that they have rejected in the past. But please do not force them to eat anything. This only creates resistance and leads to them not trying anything at all. As consistency also has a major influence on the acceptance of new food, it is recommended to prepare new food in different ways. Steamed, sliced carrots may not be a hit, but carrot “chips” roasted in the oven or simply crunchy raw carrots might be much more appealing!
2. Children need role models
When their guardians grimace at cauliflower, children learn that this vegetable is unlikely to be their favourite food. That is why it is so important to set a good example. We can certainly tell children that although we don’t like a certain food, we would like to try it again now. And if we really don’t like something ourselves, it’s also okay not to eat it and to get creative with the wide variety of foods that we do like and enjoy eating ourselves.
3. Never argue back with “It’s healthy”
To make new food less scary, we can try to compare the flavour with food that the child already knows. It can also help to explain to the child what different foods do to the body. In the morning, fruit provides the energy they need to start the day and dark green vegetables like broccoli help their muscles so that the next time they kick a ball, it goes right in the goal with plenty of power! On the other hand, arguing back with “Eat this, it’s healthy” won’t help the situation and may even intensify their aversion.
4. Let children discover food with all their senses
Sometimes the aversion to new food is so intense that you have to start small. It can be particularly helpful for very young children to explore food with their hands, touching it, pulling it apart and seeing what it’s like to crush. You can also involve older children in preparing food. Allowing children to inspect the smell, colour and consistency of new food without having to eat it helps to alleviate uncertainty and fear.
Generally speaking, it helps to make mealtimes playful. “That might mean everyone eating with their hands, for example”, says Ronia Schiftan. Or you can involve children in preparing meals by letting them top their pizza themselves or fill fajitas on their own, or by making frog-shaped veggie burgers as a family (see recipe below).
5. Do not use food as a reward or punishment
Psychologists talk about operant conditioning when positive behaviour is rewarded. Operant conditioning can be used with picky eaters by praising children for being brave and trying something new. For example, you can say, “Well done for trying it!” However, desserts should never be used as a reward and should not be denied if the child does not eat their broccoli, for example. This would teach the child that dessert is better than the main meal on their plate, which devalues the main meal and makes them like dessert even more.
Conclusion
Picky eating is a challenge for many parents and guardians with young children. The reasons for this behaviour are varied, personal and a normal part of child development. It is up to the child’s guardians to decide how to deal with it. Pressure and constant monitoring during meals can lead to stress and exacerbate the problem. Our job is to create a relaxed atmosphere at the table and demonstrate a positive attitude towards food. We should offer children a balanced selection of food and let them decide how much they eat themselves. Self-serving food also teaches children to judge their appetite. Over time, children forget to listen to their bodies when parents and guardians control their eating. Without pressure and false rewards, most picky eaters learn to enjoy food eventually.
Frog burger recipe
Here’s what you need for 4 people:
Burger patties
- Oil for frying
- Approx. 400 g carrots, coarsely grated
- Approx. 350 g leek, finely sliced
- 100 g fine wholegrain rolled oats
- 2 eggs, beaten
- 1 tsp salt
- 2 slices of raclette cheese, halved
To assemble
- 4 burger buns, sliced
- Iceberg lettuce leaves
- 1 raw beetroot, thinly sliced
- 4 tbsp BBQ sauce
- 1 gherkin, cut into four long slices
- 8 green olives stuffed with pepper paste
- 8 toothpicks
And here’s how you make it:
Burger patties
Heat a dash of oil in a frying pan. Sauté the carrots and leek for approx. 2 mins. Mix the vegetables and oats in a bowl. Add the eggs and salt, then knead by hand into a compact ball. Divide the mixture into 4 portions, shape into 4 patties, then flatten slightly. Heat the oil in the same pan. Reduce the heat, fry the patties over a medium heat for approx. 4 mins, then turn. Place a slice of cheese on top of each patty, cover and fry for approx. 4 mins, then remove.
To assemble
Toast the burger buns cut-side down in the same pan, then remove. Add the lettuce leaves to the bottom half of the burger bun. Mix the sliced beetroot with the sauce and spread over the lettuce. Place the patty and slice of gherkin on top. Cover with the top half of the burger bun and secure 2 olives on top with a toothpick to make eyes.
(Source)
References
Anderson, J. (2022). Solve picky eating: 11 expert tips for parents of picky eaters. Kids Eat in Colour. https://kidseatincolor.com/picky-eating/
Any Working Mom: Andrea Jansen & Anja Knabenhans. (15 June 2022). «Viele Ernährungs-Mythen sind Chabis». #malehrlich. https://malehrlich-der-podcast-von-anyworkingmom.podigee.io/47-ronia-schiftan#t=1559
Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (31 October 2019). Feeding a Picky Eater: The Do’s and Don’ts. https://www.chop.edu/news/dos-and-donts-feeding-picky-eaters
Czernotta, A. (2020). ARFID: Mehr als nur wählerisch beim Essen. Schweizer Zeitschrift für Ernährungsmedizin, 3, p. 23–24.
Die zehn wichtigsten Erkenntnisse für eine gute Tisch- und Esskultur beim gemeinsamen Essen in Tagesschulen. (n.d.). PEP – Gemeinsam Essen – Prävention von Essstörungen «Pepinfo». https://pepinfo.ch/media/docs/Projekte-PEP/gemeinsam-essen/10ErkenntnisseA3.pdf
Picky Eaters: Tipps für den Umgang mit schlechten Essern. (27 August 2023). Aktion Kleinkind-Ernährung. https://www.kleinkind-ernaehrung.de/picky-eater-tipps-fuer-maekelige-esser/
Wie entwickelt sich Geschmack? (27 August 2023). Aktion Kleinkind-Ernährung. https://www.kleinkind-ernaehrung.de/wie-entwickelt-sich-geschmack/
